Grump Butt

*Warning: This blog post contains negative vibes and an abundant use of the word ‘freeking’. Read further at your own risk…

It has dawned on me that it has been almost a week since I’ve posted anything. Nary a blog post or a list or a snippet or a picture has come from me in nearly a week. I could weave a tale of uber busy-dom, with a sick Critter leaving me no less than 20 antibiotic filled diapers that smell like a nail salon daily, copious amounts of snot and teeth that still have not come through. I could make up Thanksgiving world travels or Black Friday excursions, but the truth is I did none of those things (Except the diapers and I wish I could say I didn’t change those either, trust me). I drove an hour on Thanksgiving to a relative’s house, and sent my husband to Wal-Mart at 5am on Friday for a birthday present to give our beloved Smoochie this Saturday. So, why exactly have I been absent from the bloggy world?

Guh Rouch Eeee. I have been a bear wearing grumble bunny pants. I am grouchy. And I wish I could tell you why. Because it’s been more than a week, I am led to believe its not PMS related, and I can most definitely assure you every male in my home wishes it was so it could be done and over already. And the thing that kills me and makes it worse? Every single thing I get angry over is so totally little in the grand scheme of things that it’s so not worth it to stew for days.

My mother always preached to me, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” Now that I’m all grown, I try hard to live by this philosophy. 3 people in this world actually get to hear me bitch. Bonehead, my Mother, and my Sister. That’s pretty much it. So when my Mother called me last night in the middle of one of my flare ups, I let her have it.

“I’m a hamster in a freeking wheel around here. I clean a horizontal surface and someone immediately walks in behind me and fills it up. I’ve been trying to clean this house for over a week, and I’ve gotten nowhere.” In truth, I was just grouchy and had to vent it out over something- It wasn’t completely about me not being able to get the house clean. Again, little things.

My Mother and I share the same sad desire to walk into a store like Wal-Mart, place our arm as far back as we can on a shelf, and walk the entire length of said shelf, depositing every last nick and nack onto the floor. After offering me advice like, “Do what my father did and empty it all onto the floor.” She just wants to see her little fantasy come to life, I think.

Anyway, half way through the next part of my rant, she pipes up with, “So. How was your day?”

And I lost it and laughed. Rant over. Grouchy bug set aside till later. Later happened to be this morning, which has my grouchiness back in full swing. Seriously, though, I wish I could figure out the cause of my grumbliness because I’m normally a sweet, chipper, perky person.

And I don’t think anyone truly believes me when I answer the question “What’s your problem?” with the phrase, “I have no freeking clue.”
So, to sum things up and answer the question “Where have I been?”

Grouchy. I”ve been grouchy. (Insert grumble, growl, and grimace here) I’ll let you know if I figure out why.