Critter Gone Ferrell

I am surprised by the energy left in me this mid-morning as I lay him down and quickly perform a silent ninja roll back to my recliner and laptop, stopping only to turn the TV on for white noise in order to avoid waking him up with the clickity clack of my rushed blog entry. If my writing is spiraling out of control, I apologize. I am tired to the point of dizzy.

I believe Critter may be teething. Now please understand that I love Critter with everything that I am, and I am as sucked in by his little droopy blue eyes as the next person is, but he has been blessed with a giant sized Irish temper inside his little peanut body. I am sure that as he grows he will eventually grow into that Irish temperament, and things will eventually even themselves out. For now, though, that little temper (coupled with the inability to use words to communicate with his grossly inadequate mother) is a wicked wicked little kick start to the teething crankies.

His nose is stuffy/running, so he doesn’t want to be horizontal because he can’t breathe. His pacifier offers no comfort (although he won’t give up trying) because he can’t breathe through the sucking motion, and every three sucks ends up in a suction release and a gasp for air. He is a grouchy little baby bear who does not want to snuggle with his mamma at 11pm, 1am, 2am, 3am, or any other time when the rest of the sane world is sleeping. He is mad at me, his nose, his hurting little mouth, and me for not fixing it.

I 've tried. I’ve dosed him with infant Tylenol and baby Orajel, but it doesn’t help with the crankies. So last night I sucked it all up and endured alone (Bonehead had long since made a mad dash for the upstairs bedroom due to his daily 4am wakeup requirement). There were many tears and intense frustration, and I wish I could say they were all from him. There were some snuggles, some diaper changes, some feedings.

There was a police cruiser outside the front of my house at 2:30a.m. At the point I happened to glance out the window and saw it, I realized –oh, oops. My windows were open. Any neighbors that might have had their windows open were also privy to Critter’s inconsolable state.

The police officer didn’t knock on my door at all, and I’m not sure how long he was there before he pulled away. I wonder how long he was there before realizing that it was simply a mom so tired she didn’t realize her windows were open. I don’t really mind if a neighbor called, after thinking about it, because if I were the neighbor, I would have been totally worried someone might have been beating a baby. Critter can scream. He’s been blessed with the ability to shatter glass.

I did come to a couple of realizations at some point during my extremely rough night and dizzy tired morning. 1. I do not really blame Bonehead for running for the hills, because given half a chance, I would have run screaming too.(Although I have to confess that at 3am, I was so insanely jealous there were air horns and uncooked eggs in my thoughts) and 2. If there is a repeat of Critter’s Ferrell state tonight, I will be sure to close my windows in order to avoid troubling the neighbors or having a police officer knock on my door at 2am-ish.

However, I will tuck this night deep into my memory, and someday down the line, I will tell Critter the story of the night when he was teething and he screamed so loud and long he brought the police to investigate.